Powershell: Stress your CPU with some Prime Numbers

#get number of cores
$cpu = Get-WmiObject win32_processor | Select-Object Numberoflogicalprocessors
$cores = [convert]::ToInt32($cpu.Numberoflogicalprocessors, 10)

#define functions
function get-prime($i){
     for ($a=3; $a -lt $i; $a++){
        if ($i % $a -eq 0){
            return "no"
#create a task for each core
foreach ($core in 1..$cores){
    start-job -ScriptBlock {
        for ($i=1000000; $i -le 10000000; $i++){
            $prime = get-prime($i)
            if ($prime -ne "no"){
                write-output "$i"
            else {}


Wait-job *
Receive-Job *

Worst Kickstarter Projects #1: The Breakup Website

Did you ever ask yourself why you should invest time to tell someone you don’t love them anymore?
Do you think all problems can be solved with non-communicating?
Are you an asshole?

Then this Kickstarter Project is made for you!


Breakup without ever looking at your significant other

… over a website
… they’ll receive an email..

That’s what you get if you fund this Kickstarter project! A website for assholes!
I’m not kidding. This is what the project is. You enter your soon to be ex’s E-Mail. Get all your hatred out and write up a nice summary on why you break up with them. Your now ex will receive the E-Mail and can cry all night long.

Backing Options

$5 – You’ve done good
$10 – The creators of the site will send you a hateful message.
$25 – You’ll receive a copy of an e-Book „The art of Pain“. That way you can be the asshole you’ve always wanted to be!
(this is where it gets weird)
$50 – PAY THEM to DO THEIR WORK. Really that’s a fucking great deal. For $50 (you pay them) you can send them a logo you have designed yourself, with your time. It may be chosen. But probably not. Waste the best $50 of your life! /s
$100 – DOUBLE your time and enter TWO logos! If you don’t win you will at least get a fucking $100 ebook.
$250 – The E-Book and for $250 THEY WILL LISTEN TO YOUR IDEAS. Fucking awesome isn’t it??? But only for 3 Months. This must be a new business model!
$500 – E-Book and 6 Months „Access“ for saying your opinion. You’re rich and nobody want’s to listen to you? This is YOUR option.

Here comes the clue. At $500 you can use the website forever at no charge! There’s a fee you ask? Seemingly so!

Risk and Challenges

It starts off with „We’re a team of professionals“. Professionals in what? No screenshots on the site. The Picture is really bad. A „professional“ could have build the site in max. 2 hours. Why would they need the money? ($9000 by the way).


If this isn’t a money laundering operation I’m speechless.

This is a site you will be paying money for to break up.
A simple site you can build yourself with like 5 hours of training in codecademy.com (if you’re an absolute rookie).
And they want money for it.

It’s clearly just about that ebook. This is the worst marketing idea for a book.

Powershell: Get Weather Function (Working with XML and API’s)

Some more fun with Invoke-Webrequest’s and API’s.
OpenWeatherMap (http://openweathermap.org) offers a free service for their API key.
They offer many different ways on how to access their weather.

Like last time, I chose XML.
The API Request looks like this:

Invoke-WebRequest "api.openweathermap.org/data/2.5/weather?q=$City,$country&APPID=$api&mode=xml"

you add a q= Query with the City Name and for accuracy the Country. Then you give it an APPID. This is your own personal API Key that I won’t publish. You can get yours for free on the openweathermap site. Then you specify the mode, the way the request returns it’s values.

If I run the request you get the following in return:

these are really mostly stuff we won’t need. What I am interested in is the content.
To get the content of the XML, we need to tell Powershell that the return values are in fact in XML format. Like this:

$City = "Lucerne"
$country = "CH"
[ xml ]$wr = Invoke-WebRequest "api.openweathermap.org/data/2.5/weather?q=$City,$country&APPID=$api&mode=xml"

Remove the spaces in xml in front of $wr – my script displaying engine does not like the term like that 🙂

Now, to be able to search through the XML, we need to see which member contains all the Information.
That’s easy to find out since the only member with the Type „Property“ is the one we are looking for. (Or the ones, if you query several days / cities)

Well – if we put in $wr.current we’ll see that this is exactly what we want.
city : city
temperature : temperature
humidity : humidity
pressure : pressure
wind : wind
clouds : clouds
visibility :
precipitation : precipitation
weather : weather
lastupdate : lastupdate

These are all the properties we can use for our weather.
If you want to see what’s inside of Temperature you can do the following:


It will return something like this:
to just get one of these you can do this:


(or min, max and unit for that example)

Now we have a query that returns us one single response. That’s great we can work with that.

Since it’s a bit redundant to always have to enter $wr.current we give it another $Variable

 $data = $wr.current 

Now we need to build our response.
I want it like that:
Temp. NOW:
Temp. MAX:
Temp. MIN:

To achieve this I first browse through all the properties and write down the values I want.
Then I simply build a write-host construct.

    write-host "City:          " $data.city.name $data.city.country
    write-host "Weather:       " $data.weather.value
    write-host "Temp. NOW:     " ([math]::Round(($data.temperature.value - 273.15),2))"°C"
    write-host "Temp. MAX:     " ([math]::Round(($data.temperature.max - 273.15),2))"°C"
    write-host "Temp. MIN:     " ([math]::Round(($data.temperature.min - 273.15),2))"°C"
    write-host "Humidity:      " $data.humidity.value $data.humidity.unit
    write-host "Clouds:        " $data.clouds.name
    write-host "Rain:          " $data.precipitation.mode
    write-host "Wind:          " $data.wind.Value
    write-host "Pressure:      " $data.pressure.value

Remember when we were displaying the temperature values? They were in Kelvin. To get Celsius simply subtract 273.15 (like we learned in school a long time ago :))
But the values are really exact. – I’ve rounded them with the C# lib „math“ to two digits after the comma.

Next step is to make a function out of it. This needs parameters. I added default values for my most searched city:

function get-weather {
        [string]$City = "Lucerne",
        [string]$country = "CH"

you can get the weather with
get-weather Washington US
If you don’t specify the country it will always be the one you entered as $country in your params.

Now the whole script:

function get-weather {
        [string]$City = "Lucerne",
        [string]$country = "CH"

    $api = "get your API at openweathermap.org"
    [ xml ]$wr = Invoke-WebRequest "api.openweathermap.org/data/2.5/weather?q=$City,$country&APPID=$api&mode=xml"
    $data = $wr.current
    write-host "City:          " $data.city.name $data.city.country
    write-host "Weather:       " $data.weather.value
    write-host "Temp. NOW:     " ([math]::Round(($data.temperature.value - 273.15),2))"°C"
    write-host "Temp. MAX:     " ([math]::Round(($data.temperature.max - 273.15),2))"°C"
    write-host "Temp. MIN:     " ([math]::Round(($data.temperature.min - 273.15),2))"°C"
    write-host "Humidity:      " $data.humidity.value $data.humidity.unit
    write-host "Clouds:        " $data.clouds.name
    write-host "Rain:          " $data.precipitation.mode
    write-host "Wind:          " $data.wind.Value
    write-host "Pressure:      " $data.pressure.value

Remove the spaces in xml in front of $wr – my script displaying engine does not like the term like that 🙂

Snoverisms: POSH – Like programming with hand grenades Sticker

I stumbled upon a post in /r/powershell which linked to this site: http://snoverisms.com/
I liked the first quote so much that I made a sticker with a Silhouette printer!
Here’s the PNG (In Silhouette you have to insert PNG’s and later convert them to svg like files … whatever): powershell

The stickers look like this
here’s the positive:

and here’s the negative (already on my notebook sorry!):

Quick Spellcheck with PowerShell

I’m a person that always needs to google words just to see if they even exist. I made a quick Powershell for that just to check whether or not the word even exists (by using the Wikipedia API – Which normalizes most inputs by itself)

The wikipedia API query will look like this:


It’s really easy – at the beginning of the link you set the language your word will be. I’ll set that with the var $lang.
After the domain you’ll tell it to use the public API (Documentation here. )
I want to do a query (action=query) on all sites that have a title containing my $word variable. (titles=$word) and I want it in XML because it’s quite easy to handle in Powershell (format=xml).

Now I’ll need some input for my variables:

function check-word {


That way the quick spellchecker can now be used like that: check-word wordpress de. This tells the API to look for German pages containing the word „wordpress“.

Next thing is to get the Data from the API:

$url = "https://$lang.wikipedia.org/w/api.php?action=query&titles=$word&format=xml"
$webq = Invoke-WebRequest $url

You could do this in one line but for troubleshooting and understanding it’s better to keep it separated.

$webq will look like this:

In content you’ll see it normalized the query.

If I mistype the query it will look like this:

As you see here Content contains the word missing. That’s the API’s way of telling you that it doesn’t exist.
Now we can work with that.
Next step is to check for that word missing:

$webqc = $webq | select-object content
$exists = $webqc -match "missing"

No here comes the tricky thing: $exits will either contain $true or $false. But it will contain $true if the word DOES NOT exist. And it will contain $false if the word exists.

It’s so important because we want to see a little output and have to think reversed:

if ($exists) {Write-Output "Not Correct"} else {"Correct"}

So after all this there’s not much left to do, here’s the full script:

function check-word {
    $url = "https://$lang.wikipedia.org/w/api.php?action=query&titles=$word&format=xml"
    $webq = Invoke-WebRequest $url
    $webqc = $webq | select-object content
    # Variable will contain $true if word does not exist - $false if word exists
    $exists = $webqc -match "missing"
    if ($exists) {Write-Output "Not Correct"} else {"Correct"}

Put it in your $profile and you’ll always have quick quick spellcheck handy if you just need to see if you wrote that word correctly.
If you want to use it in a work environment make sure to check out how to authenticate your shell against a proxy here: Automatic Proxy Authentication from $Profile

If you got any questions or tips and tricks on how to make this script better, leave a comment!

Hands-Off Review: HTC One M9

Hello guys – this is a new section of my blog which will unleash the the worst quality of me. I will make everything bad.
I call it Hands-Off Review. It works like that:
If I see some new gadget or similar, and there’s something about it that REALLY bothers me, I will write a Review on how it’s stupid without even touching the device.

Let’s get started

The HTC One M9


The specs of this device look absolutely awesome. It features a Full HD Display, an OK Battery and a 20MP Camera. All around something that may be useful to use.
And you can add an SD Card for more space.


It has the typical HTC look to it. Metal and round edges. There’s something that is really really bothering me.
Do you see that?
That there is the reason I want to hit the designer of this thing.

Well you may think I’ve gone crazy now but I’ll explain.
There’s quite a lot of space wasted by the speakers:

Then… they wasted a lot of space just to get their HTC logo there:

And then. Instead of doing the ONE LOGICAL THING and put the buttons where the HTC logo is, they used SOFTWARE BUTTONS – which is the android Space Waster No. 1!
So to put that into perspective, all the red space is absolutely wasted and all the green space is what you can use for browsing or using the phone:
Who thinks this is OK?

Dear HTC – You’ve been doing this for ages now, please stop it makes your phones ugly af.

Final words

Although the hardware on that thing is awesome – I couldn’t stand looking at that thing for more than a half day.

side note about Space Wasters: The iPhone 6+ is as big as the Galaxy Note 4. The iPhone is 5.5″ and the Note 5.7″ (and amazingly still faster and better hardware than the 6s+)

POSH: Using ~ for your home directory

Out of habit I used

cd ~

in the Powershell ISE today. Lucky for me Powershell then showed me that you can actually use ~ for your home directory. Just enter the following command:

(get-psprovider 'FileSystem').home = "P:\ath\to\Home"

As soon you have done this you’ll never have to break out of habit to get to your main folder.

Powershell: Get your printers ready

Ready to use functions for your next printer script:

Create Printer


function CreatePrinter {
$server = $args[0]
$print = ([WMICLASS]"\\$server\ROOT\cimv2:Win32_Printer").createInstance()
$print.drivername = $args[1]
$print.PortName = $args[2]
$print.Shared = $true
$print.published = $true
$print.Sharename = $args[3]
$print.Location = $args[4]
$print.Comment = $args[5]
$print.DeviceID = $args[6]


createprinter servername drivername portname sharename location comment deviceID

DeviceID and Sharename may be the same. Disable $print.shared and .published if you do not want the printer to be created in AD.
This is great for creating a printer via CSV File.

Create Printer Port

function CreatePrinterPort {
$server =  $args[0]
$port = ([WMICLASS]"\\$server\ROOT\cimv2:Win32_TCPIPPrinterPort").createInstance()
$port.Name= $args[1]
$port.HostAddress= $args[2]


CreatePrinterPort servername portname hostaddress

Create the ports first if they do not already exist!

Delete Printer

function DeletePrinter {
    Get-WmiObject -class "Win32_Printer" -ComputerName $Server -namespace "root\CIMV2" |
    Where-Object {$_.name -eq $printer} | ForEach-Object {

Rename Printer

function RenamePrinter {
    Invoke-WmiMethod -path "Win32_Printer.DeviceID='$oldname'" -name RenamePrinter -ArgumentList "$newname" -ComputerName "$server"

MOTD for Powershell (Using the fortune-mod (linux) Package files)

I downloaded and altered the fortune-mod fortune files so that there’s one fortune per line. This can be downloaded here:

Next step is to add the following thing to your $Profile

function get-motd{
$fortunes = get-content \path\to\fortunes.txt
get-random -InputObject $fortunes

It’s virtually important that you run the function after the clear-host. Otherwise the quote will not appear / will be erradicated before it even had time to present itself to you)